30 March 2010


The Dubai World Cup was held over the weekend, inaugurating the new Meydan Race Course, which is truly an architectural wonder, spectacular when viewed from the air. Meydan is of course already well known as the primary promulgator of Sheikh Mohammed's vision throughout the FEI Nation sponsor of the Meydan FEI Nations' Cup Series in Jumping, and of the Endurance discipline at the upcoming Alltech FEI World Equestrian Games:
Through our partnership with the FEI we will be able to share the vision of His Highness Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum with the wider horse sport community, a vision of Meydan as a venue like no other sporting arena in the world.
Especially interesting in the aftermath of the 2008 Olympics, Meydan has also recently partnered with China to build a giant, sure-to-be-over-the-top, US $4 billion Horse City near Tianjin. That's pretty cool.

29 March 2010

Don't Try This At Home, Kids

In the most disturbing pic we've seen in awhile, or at least since Eventing Nation's horse diving spread:

The head of a horse emerges from the flames as a man rides it through a purifying bonfire in San Bartolome de Pinares, Spain, Jan. 16, 2010. (AP Photo/Daniel Ochoa de Olza)

These people should be locked up.

Speaking of Eventing Nation, this guy is really a riot. Be sure to check it out; you don't even have to be an eventer:
News of the Weird: Firefighters saved two horses from a river after a sex crazed amorous stallion jumped in the river to save his girlfriend, which, incidentally, sounds a lot like my prom night.
Go Eventing Nation.

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26 March 2010

Angry Horses Descend On Wellington, Florida Village Council, Demand Answers

In the interest of expanding the appeal of equestrian sport and offering a family-friendly lifestyle, some well-intentioned folks thought it sounded like a great idea to combine last Friday night's puissance class at the Winter Equestrian Festival with a rather bass-heavy concert by a disturbingly family-friendly performer named Akon.

Someone New To Be Put In Charge Of ALL BS

British Showjumping (all one word now; see related story) Chief Executive Diana Cornish is stepping down after only a little over a year in the role. Apparently Ms. Cornish, coming from a professional employment background, just can't take it anymore. "The role as CEO of a membership organisation governed by committee is very different to the three CEO positions I held in public companies, and quite frankly, you people have lost the plot, " she commented.

The selection of someone new to be put in charge of all BS follows on the heels of someone new being put in charge of some BS. Last year there was a whole lot of BS, and you can read about at least some of the BS here and here. And here.
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25 March 2010

FEI Resolves Eventing Safety Controversy

The rebranding fanatics at the FEI have been keeping busy as resolving major controversies in a single day's work is the new standard. First Clean Sport became Clean Sport: Now With NSAIDs! despite the idiocy of introducing such an over-the-top PR concept at the same time that you secretly redefine it, all while the non-equestrian media are still tuned in due to the manufactured Hong Kong "doping crisis" and you haven't even allowed the opposition at the table for discussion even though the FEI Statutes explicity require it.

Then rollkur/hyperflexion became LDR so that rollkur/hyperflexion could be banned to placate the masses (except the masses didn't buy it). And now rollkur/hyperflexion effectively no longer exists, because accomplished international riders have no need for force and anyhow, Dr. Hilary Clayton says it's biomechanically impossible.

Now the marketing types are on to Eventing.

Dogs Rule!

Some very clever Labradors figure out how to have some fun.

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23 March 2010

Another Endurance World Record Falls (Allegedly)

The endurance world record for 160 kms has been broken yet again, at the Dubai Crown Prince Endurance Cup held Sunday at Dubai International Endurance City. Yousuf Ahmad Al Beloushi came in at 5 hours 45 minutes and 44 seconds on cheval du jour Jayhal Shazal for an average speed of 27.77 kms per hour with the final loop rating an astonishing 35.53 kms per hour. The mind boggles. The Crown Prince himself, Sheikh Hamdan Bin Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum, came in second, also breaking the world record as did the third-place finisher. No word yet on if the course actually measured the full 160 kms or if that was just a rough guess, as surely no one who is not on Dubai's payroll did any measuring. And we all know how much these guys love to go 160 kms over there; they just can't get enough of it. The Carrot knows this particular question is worth asking whenever a world record falls in the Gulf.

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I Wanna Be A Cowboy...

Animals everywhere are being inspired by Whiplash, the Cowboy Monkey:

22 March 2010

The Latest From Nag & Dog

A nondescript but much-loved pony near Tewkesbury, Gloucestershire suffered a nasty cut on his foreleg today. This was promptly stitched up by his capable veterinarian and he is expected to make a full recovery with perhaps a slight scar. No roads were blocked, no rescuers were called, no horrified onlookers gathered. His little girl did not even cry. But the pony did suffer some emotional distress, and we just thought the entire UK and even all of the interwebs should know about it. If it bleeds, it leads! In future, every horse and pony in the UK will be featured in Nag & Dog for 15 minutes. But we'll leave the tough issues for the general public to tackle*.

*As long as they don't do it on our forum.

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18 March 2010

The Carrot Reads From History's Great Manifestos

The Carrot believes it is important to read, even if you're a vegetable. Recently, we dabbled in Marx and Engels' The Communist Manifesto:
"Democracy is the road to socialism."
"Hitherto, every form of society has been based...on the antagonism of oppressing and oppressed classes."
And now we turn to something that is clearly in the same league, HRH Princess Haya's FEI Presidential Manifesto:
"I see my role as President being as follows:
I see myself as a Facilitator. In other words, I do not wish to interfere with the day to day management of the Secretariat or the workings of the Bureau, but to guide and advise where necessary."

You can't make this stuff up.

This is sure to be a fun Carrot feature during the upcoming campaign season! Because sometimes, you just can't improve upon reality.

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Official: More People Want To Ban Equestrianism Than Support Patrik Kittel

Because online petitions are so very meaningful and the FEI so very reactive, The Carrot has been tracking closely the petition to ban all equestrianism, put forth by a fascinating character named Alexander Nevzorov, who depending on who we consult about his possible KGB affiliation employment history, we might want to stop messing with. We found the following excerpt from his book, The Horse Crucified and Risen, somewhat personally disturbing:

17 March 2010

Dressage Continues To Go Epizootic

This is old but we hadn't seen it. It would appear a bull cannot be rollkured either.

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16 March 2010

Hallelujah! European Equestrian Federation To Propose Candidate For FEI Presidency

As reported by the intrepid St. Georg a while ago, but ignored in the English-language press and only recently translated with 100 per cent accuracy by Google, the EEF have indicated the intent to put forward a candidate to challenge Princess Haya in her misguided bid for a second presidential term. And here we thought it was a two-horse race between the lesser of two evils.

Dubya is going to have to get busy, y'all. He hasn't even put forth his dictatorial presidential Manifesto yet. The Carrot will naturally wait to see who the Europeans come up with before officially endorsing a candidate.
"Also if yet no names fell, be might already the search for a European candidate, that is ready to begin in the autumn against FEI Präsidentin Haya, in full gear. The wife of the Dubai sheikh Mohammed Maktoum can above all on the voices from Africa, count Asia and South America. 'Our candidate may no coward be,' says [Hanfried] Haring. 'For Haya not so quickly will abandon.'"
"The FEI welcomes this development," said FEI President Princess Haya.

The political shenanigans between Haya's attempted re-election and the re-proposal of the progressive list promise to be fascinating. And just how much money is Sheikh Mohammed willing to spend to get his junior wife re-elected and keep her sufficiently busy to prevent her becoming a political problem at home?

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An Interesting Pas de Deux

Or, Camels Can't Be Rollkured (it appears to be anatomically impossible)

Thanks to reader Sara for this fascinating introduction to camel dressage.

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13 March 2010

Troubled Horses Find Way To Express Their Pain

"Humans often use animals to help troubled kids, provide company for the elderly, and service for the disabled. But what do you do when the animal is troubled and needs help?"
Artist Cheryl Ward:
"Painting was something I felt that enabled him to be a complete horse. This type of training asks the horse: What do you want to do? What makes you happy about being a horse?"

08 March 2010

New FEI Nations' Cup Formula A Rousing Success

A new FEI Nations' Cup formula debuted in Wellington, Florida (USA) on Friday, to raucous approval from an enthusiastic public that under new rules actually gets to participate in the event itself. In a rather drastic move to try to give the so-called "promotional leagues" their own distinctive brand and increase general appeal of the sport, the FEI revised these second-tier-and-beyond CSIOs for 2010 to include a new round in which team riders negotiate a varied obstacle course filled with revelers from rival nations who have had a few too many drinks. The exciting proposal was originally the brainchild of the fledgling North American Riders' Group (NARG), who are hoping to create a more rodeo-like atmosphere to build a broader spectator base for show jumping.